Make us Laugh and Win National Lampoon’s Cattle Call DVD’s

National Lampoon presents CATTLE CALL: a down and dirty casting-couch comedy crammed with girls, gags and gaffes set for a DVD retail release on 14 July courtesy of Momentum Pictures. It revolves around the frustrations of a man (Thomas Ian Nicholas – American Pie) who goes to unusual – but laugh-out-loud lengths – to find a woman worth having!
Packed with pin-up perfect women who take their fate lying down – and loaded with laughs – this is an hilarious, raunchy teen comedy, ideal for the lads. The film also features stars from American Pie, Balls of Fire, Reno 911: Miami and Baywatch.
Here’s how the story goes: Ritchie Ray seems to have it all – he’s a wealthy successful businessman, president of internet dating service, no less. But while Ritchie’s professional life is all about creating the perfect match, in his personal life he ironically suffers from continual ‘unsuccessful dating exhaustion’.
So with his best friend, Ritchie decides to start a fake casting agency and makes a desperate attempt (well, many attempts) to find the perfect woman.
However with a trail of stalkers, strippers and nymphomaniacs, the path to true perfection is far from easy…

We have 3 copies of this great DVD up for grabs to lucky Girlie Gossip members! All you have to do, to be in with a chance of winning is post your favourite joke (Keep it CLEAN please folks) by clicking the reply button below! We will then choose 3 winners based on our favourites! One joke per person please and remember, keep it clean or you may be disqualified!

competition now closed!!


  • carla says:

    I was at a bar, I asked a girl to dance, and every time I twirled her around, she got two inches taller. I said, “What’s going on?” She said, “You’re unscrewing my wooden leg”


    What happened to jesus when he went to mount olive?

    Popeye kicked his head in.

  • dengolby says:

    A man walks into a hardware store and asks if they have a tool for breaking up some hard ground. The shop assistant points to a row of suitable tools along the wall and replies: “Certainly sir, take your pick.”

  • purplevamp says:

    what’s a cats favourite colour?


  • chrisma232 says:

    Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and
    every year Morris would say, ‘Esther,I’d like to ride in that

    Esther always replied, ‘I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is
    fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars’

    One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said,
    ‘Esther, I’m 85 years old. If I don’t ride that helicopter, I
    might never get another chance.’

    To this, Esther replied, ‘Morris that helicopter ride is fifty
    dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.’

    The pilot overheard the couple and said, ‘Folks I’ll make you a
    deal. I’ll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet
    for the entire ride and don’t say a word I won’t charge you a
    penny! But if you say one word it’s fifty dollars.’

    Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds
    of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil
    tricks over and over again, but still not a word.

    When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, ‘By golly,
    I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn’t.
    I’m impressed!’

    Morris replied, ‘Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said
    something when Esther fell out, but you know, fifty dollars is
    fifty dollars!

  • suesusy says:

    What do you call a monkey in a minefield?
    A baboom

  • taniaminx says:

    Doctor: “I’ve got very bad news – you’ve got Cancer and Alzheimer’s”
    Patient: “Well, at least I don’t have cancer”

  • clairesims1978 says:

    How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?

    From a catalogue !!

  • clairesims1978 says:

    A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there’s a strict policy about having snails in the bar and so kicks him out. A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman “What did you do that for?”

  • dawnylou says:

    What is ET short for??

    He’s only got little legs…..

  • Lo-Lo says:

    This is funnier if you read it out loud…

    Why has Edward Woodward got so many Ds in his name?

    Cos otherwise he’d be Eeewaar Woowaar

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